Back to the gym (sigh)

Like many compounds in Dubai, ours has a gym that I visit erratically. It overlooks the pool, so while you’re working out, you can watch swimmers and sunbathers, which makes it marginally more interesting, I suppose.

For a while, it was a running joke that it was harder to gain access to the gym than it was to drive into our compound. If you’re behind the wheel of a 4×4, merely looking like an expat is usually enough to get you waved through security into our compound, whereas the gym became all draconian, requiring paperwork, access keys and a signing-in-and-out system.

The Yummy Mummies straight after school drop off (who I secretly want to look like)

All rather off-putting, especially if you’re not particularly gym-inclined in the first place.

Today, I got past the security guard perched outside the gym with no problem, and stepped on the treadmill to start my back-to-the-gym campaign.

Admittedly, it was a soft, leisurely start and so as the conveyor belt revolved at a fast walking-pace beneath my feet and my lungs contracted, I had time to read the gym rules.

I just love the rules that are posted in public places in Dubai. They’re always amusing…here are a few of my favourites from the gym:

● Wear proper gym attire (athletic tennis or cross training shoes only, T-shirt, shorts, or sweat pants. NO: Jeans, sandals, open-toe shoes or boots) … [Boots! As if! Half expected heels to be listed too]

● Do not put hands on mirrors … [you cheeky monkey]

● Only water bottles to be used in the gym & on equipment. Cups are prohibited … [so leave them at home, naughty!]

● Do not use weights on cardiovascular equipment … [do people actually do this?]

● No bags (gym bags, purses or back packs) allowed on the gym floor … [don’t say you weren’t warned!]

Though, perhaps the funniest thing was the sweet cleaning lady in the restroom afterwards who started wafting a big wad of tissues by my bright-red face, fanning me as though I was about to expire.

In my defence, the AC was broken – yes, really! And humidity levels are in the ‘high stress’ zone this month.


About Circles in the Sand

Sun worshiper, journalist, mother, pilot's wife and distracted housewife living in the land of glitz and sand
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7 Responses to Back to the gym (sigh)

  1. MsCaroline says:

    Wow, your resolve is much higher than mine – the broken AC would have sent me running! Good for you for sticking with your resolve. Our apartment complex gym doesn’t have a list of rules but they have signs on all the cardio equipment that say, “Please wipe sweat on the machines. Thank you.”
    I get what they’re trying to say, but it still makes me snicker every time.

    • That IS funny!! Here, I always see a sign in elevators that says, ‘In case of fire, do not use elevator’ – it might just be me, but don’t you think that suggests you should never use the elevator in case there’s a fire? Maybe it’s my subconscious telling me to take the stairs!

  2. Molly Gryskiewicz says:

    M, wish we could workout together…and maybe find some motivation…I told Chris this evening if I want to keep eating so much I will need to workout 24/7!!!!

  3. tracye1 says:

    For awhile at our gym (before the new owners) we had young men come in and work out with flip flops! Drove me up a WALL!!! Seriously?? You’re working out with flip flops??? And there is a guy (we call him the Gross Guy) who wears teensy shorts and a tank with barely any material so he can showcase his goods….he’s a grunter, a sweater and OLD. I audibly groan when I see him….and yes, sometimes in winter he works out in jeans. Unbelievable.

  4. Pingback: Silent Sunday: Gym rules part 2 « Circles in the Sand

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